golden face

Beneath the sea we singers of all things

bleed graces upon glassy silver strand

The clouds above, the song amongst us rings

as breakers break, each one lifts up a hand

We long to go above, too far to tread

each in our place and we can barely stand

All we can do is look below and head

unto the depths, blue ocean grey and cold

where other sorrowed singers hold their stead

and long, like ups, until they have grown old

Ascend and look above and wonder yet

if many more of oceans fit our mold

For now, we sing and our eyes we shall set

Upon the great gold face of king of sky.

drink

Within the sorrows of a fettered mind

I slowly drown in pools of stagnant brew

Upon the mirror of reflecting kind

I stare and I ignore what once I knew.

No single thought retains thus now in me

My ignorance has never been my bliss

I try to open eyes that I might see

But drunken ache restrains my heart’s last wish.

I want to breathe the air above again

Or see the happiness that once we had

I try to stand in hopes that I might mend

Yet knees they buckle like an unborn lad.

Tomorrow I will pour this down the sink

For now I think I’ll have another drink.

like snow

a picture like poetry
she dances like snow
loneliness and aching
fall in like snow
what is there left
to pick from the earth
no hearts remain
all are discarded
full of emptiness
spilling outward
crowded room
and nothing to hold
no partaking
not allowed
everything silent
rushing white noise
tomorrow maybe
something will happen
not now
it's not allowed

take away
all our lonely hearts
feed us again
with dirt and breath
make us alive again

as we once were

i so wish to forget this thrice accursed past

yet as the winds of time and sands of fate converge

the memory is sealed within, deep inside my being

still, as the tempest rends my flesh from bone

the power of purest truth brings healing to my soul

and slowly as the earth revolves upon its crystal axis

my heart forgets the thousand sins placed upon my head

and as the years descend into the pit dividing right and wrong

my mind becomes one with myself

as we all once were

song of there

the melody of broken grass
weeping trees
and beaming blooms
of thoughtful pines
sparkling waters
and the scent of old becoming new
what a beautiful song it makes

take me away
to where the flowers sing
and trees whisper secrets long untold
into my ear
where babbling brooks tell tales
of every thing that has passed by
and pines and aspens argue aloud
but they're really friends deep down

i want to go there
away from this place
where the song is muted
the beautiful song set
spinning into motion by the hand of God
at creation
i cannot hear it from here

but if not that
then i wish, in place of the first
to be taught the song of this place
so that i can sing it, too
along with the rest of men

knife in hand

i woke up this morning with a knife in my hand

i walk down the hallway
they talk
i smile back
and nod
and that is all

i woke up and looked at the knife in my hand
where did it come from?

i am lost wherever i go
nowhere is home
everywhere is unknown
no one seems to follow me
maybe it is the wrong way

i realized today that i walk with a knife in hand
where did it come from?
i don't know

i am dreaming
with my eyes open
everything moves
but i do not
i am frozen in place
a terrible dream

i woke up this morning with a knife in my chest
where did it come from?
i don't know
i am afraid to ask
so i won't

selfish

i am a selfish beast
for i weep
but not for sorrow's sake
i weep because of people
but not because of their sorrows
i weep because i am lonely
but not because there is no one to ease my sorrow
i weep because i long for attention
i am a selfish beast indeed

my own scars

do you know the sorrows that grace my mind?
the craters where lighting rent the earth?
there are so many
is it possible for you to know all of them?

even if it were, would i let you?
could i let you in to examine every scar?
to dig into the wounds that pain me?
to know my sorrows, my burden?

those things which make me me
define me, explain me?
things i hold dear and hate so much?
which bind me to the earth, and make me smile, but only sadly?

no, not ever
not now
i cannot let you now
so don't even try
i will fight you with my very life
i do not trust you with my life

oppressive

the weight of the world
bows my head
shuts my eyes
makes me dead

holds my voice
within my head
binds my hands
with bricks of lead

i cannot breathe
i cannot speak
i cannot think
i cannot be

i cannot move
i cannot blink
i cannot stand
i only shrink

fetters bind
my silent feet
chains unwind
and bind complete

i can't look up
to see the sky
they won't let me
i don't try

they are cold
and heartless beasts
my last resort
shall me release

heaven, save me
i'm afraid
before i die
now i pray

start in the middle

start in the middle
and go around
spinning and singing
hear the sound
of shattered glass
and child's voice
let whispered words
give you a choice
stop this rhyme
and wonder always
what will happen
to him who stays
or continue
round and round
endless circles
of rhyme and sound
to reach the end
read final verse
find satisfaction
or the worst
if quickly you
proceed then know
the quick man falls
the slow man knows
that next verse waits
of spiral sounds
just answer first question
and go around
speak too fast
be quick man's friend
think this through
slow man come again

circles

we are circles
round and round we spin
with no beginning
and no end
nothing for us
but to go around again
for we are circles
and we cannot complain

what?

with no beginning
we have been
with no ending
we shall be

but what are we?
who are we?
why are we?
what are we?

a world of make believe

don't tell me that you know
don't tell me that you understand
don't give me any words of pity
if you do, i will break again

let me live in my world of make believe
where nothing has gone wrong, like it did
where everything is as it used to be
leave me in the dark, pretending

tell me no truths
i beg you, only tell me lies
so that i don't have to face that reality
the one i never wanted

tell me what i want to hear
don't tell me what truly waits
before my eyes, so fiercely closed
since my world was torn apart

please, say nothing that will remind me
my heart is dead to now
my mind still lives in then, away
from what i can't accept

don't let me know that you know
leave me in my safe haven
far from the blistering fingers of truth
let me hide in my mind

let me live away from reality
let me lose memory for sanity's sake
let me hold tight to hopes and dreams
as if they were what happens

Let me live in this world of make believe
let me live like my heart's still there
let me be who I was, who I wish to be
And leave me alone with my tears

ocean

once upon a time we saw the ocean far and wide
the beautiful and snow-white shore, it called us to its side
and as we floated far away, the birds began to sing
a farewell call, a goodbye kiss,
then final bell did ring

kings and castles

setting sun, with golden beam
skidding clouds and skies of blue
evening glow, the night shall sing
wait for us, we'll fly away
tomorrow comes, tonight is first
for now we sit, in darkness stay
the stars above, soft words they bring
same as before, 'tis nothing new

what shall we say to kings and castles?
they offer us no place to hide
with king so great, castle so high
what good are we, who weep and sigh?
indeed, the peasants who wait in darkness
must wait for sunrise to bring them rest

tomorrow's somewhere

once a somewhere, i remember
once a nowhere, i will be
today's tomorrow, some september
with broken hearts and bleeding we
tomorrow's nothings, we shall know
that truth and lies hold nothing now
and all our somethings, they shall grow
tomorrow shall be, this i vow

remember this,
tomorrow's ours
we search our hearts
to know our scars